Tips for Women to Survive Football Season
Football season lasts a long time –until February 5th this year– so I am going to give you some tips on how to get through the season if you aren’t a die-hard fan. Usually we non-footballers get a break when the Texans stop playing but OMG, they are in the playoffs and have even won a playoff game. Isn’t that a sign the world really will end in 2012? Just joking, guys. So ladies, here are some tips to make it past Feb. 5.
1. Do some homework before the game-
Know who is playing, who the quarterbacks are (that shouldn’t be hard most of them are kinda cute) and who the key players are, if you are really trying to impress the boys you might even find out the team’s record and any other pertinent information about the teams playing. Look up the game on ESPN.com for some “talking points” and choose wisely, I found out that guys don’t care that Troy Polamalu insured his hair for a million dollars. Seriously. A million dollars. Why isn’t that an important football fact?
2. Respect the sport-
It is hard when you don’t understand something not to say, “That’s stupid” and football can be hard to understand. Really hard. There are crazy rules that make it difficult for folks at home to follow along. There are “Tuck” rules which don’t mean what I thought they would mean…trust me. There are “Pass interference and Illegal contact” rules which seem like they would be fairly important rules to the guy squashed underneath a pile of other guys, there is also a “Down without Contact” rule which basically means if you fall down you better hope that someone pushed you and a whole bunch of other rules that the referees seem to make up as they go along.
The best thing for you to do is groan when everyone groans and cheer when everyone cheers. Even if it all seems a little, well…stupid.
3. Cheering for the team-
This is a particularly sensitive point to the avid fan, which team will get your all important “Go, Team, Go!” Growing up in Texas I usually like to root for a Texas team, but I am from Austin so if it is Dallas or Houston? It doesn’t matter, we are all from Texas. Right? Wrong! There is a certain logistic for rooting for a Texas team, for example, if one team has a chance to go to the Superbowl and the other doesn’t have a chance in “Monday Night Football” then you put your differences aside and root for Tennessee. Yeah, I went there.
4. What NOT to say …
“Does Tim Tebow have gas!” That’s what it looks like to me. Just sayin’.
“It doesn’t matter who wins” It does, for some reason it really does.
“It’s just a game.” Yikes…time to go for a beer run.
“Fantasy Football is stupid” Okay, come on it IS stupid!
“Now who has the ball?” Apparently that gets annoying.
and lastly ” Did you know a football player had his hair insured for a MILLION dollars?!?”